UGT Presents: Erotique Noire… What's Your Fantasy? July 16

One way to pack the Linda Auditorium on Central Ave. is with the erotic, so I had to show up, hoping to last all night (like a 20-year old). And wouldn't you know, the host, Mojavi, had me go first (or was it Ms. Bliss who was controlling the list?). So I performed my poem, a favorite of 3 Guys from Albany performances, "To My Penis."  Then I was followed by Mary Panza with, as she said, poems out of the Archives, including my favorite "The Blues."

That barely got the night going. In between, Mojavi helped promote the table of sex-toys & paraphrenalia that was doing the kind of business you would expect, so if you think that's a dildo in his hand in the photo, you are correct. And then poets were all women from that point on (up to the stand-up comic).

I try to keep notes on the poets & the poems but I'm having trouble reading these pages & some are stuck together. I know there was Penny with an ode to safe sex, &

Blue Storm with a paean to her dildo, "Me Myself & My Rabbitt" She also offered some of the most helpful advice for the night, "suck a dick & save a life." Antoinette Lawson had a sexy poem called (I think) "Undress" then a couple of more women doing a whole string of candlelight sex & fantasy poems, oh yes. Camilla Henry sang songs done by Alicia Keys, then Nakia Tillman thought about her boyfriend after he breaks her heart.

It had been a long day & I was on my own & the heat kept getting turned up & the toy table was confusing, & I was perhaps the oldest white guy in the room & it was time to go home. I'm sure I missed lots of good stuff.

It's not always erotica at UGT, but that frequently rears its beautiful head (so to speak) not matter what the theme of the night might be. The third Friday at WMHT's Linda Auditorium. Check the website for the next theme.